Should I Let a Sleeping Dog Lie. .
Because I believe that some of you folks are actually smart, I need your help with a life situation. Go get your coffee (or your warm milk if it’s nighttime) and lemme know what you think.
When I was in middle school I was friends with a girl named Carol, we were in a crew of four. We did a lot of stuff together, but by the time I hit the 9th grade (back then, middle school went to 9th grade) Carol and the other 3 broads decided that they hated me and we didn’t hang out anymore.
Last year, through the magic (and curse) that is Facebook we went to a party thrown by mutual friends and Carol was there. After being so excited to get reacquainted, we started hanging out together. I wasn’t working, so I was pretty much free all the time. She’s a lawyer with her own practice so she set her own hours. We went out pretty much every other weekend and had a great time. There were things about her that irked me, but isn’t that everybody? However, she’s the judgemental friend. The one that prefaces everything with, “you know you’re my girl” and then uses that as an excuse to be blunt almost to the point of rude. She’ll say things like, “this is what you should do” and things of that nature.
Earlier this year, she turned 32, a moment that made her “re-evaluate her life.” She dissolved the law practice and went into a tailspin about where she was gonna apply for school. She needed to get out of Florida because she felt that the man market was also coming up dry.
After much deliberation, she decides that she’s moving back to Atlanta. (o_O) There’s nothing left for her in Florida, and wants to get her life started. (I can relate) She says that she’s leaving in August and since I’m not working, I should drive to Atlanta with her. “Yeah, that’ll be fun,” and we leave it at that. Since she’s leaving in August, (and we talked about this in May) we had more than enough time to plan.
The next week, we’re on the phone and she says something like, “Yeah, I decided to leave next week. I let her talk, but because I’m more observant than most, I made the following conclusions:
1. She’s not planning on having me go ANYWHERE with her because:
1a. If you and I are planning a road trip, and you decided to push up the date by a couple months, shouldn’t you run it by the other person that was going with you to see if that’s ok?
The way that she declaratively stated “I’m leaving next week Thursday” as opposed to “I wanna leave early, would you still be able to come (or some other derivative)” meant that she no longer saw me as a factor.
So, she informs me that she’s going out with “the girls” to have dinner and see the Sex and the City movie and she’ll say her salutations to all of them then. The fact that I wasn’t invited to this “goodbye dinner” also spoke volumes. I’ve once again deduced that I was good enough to be that “party chick” and the “what are we doing this weekend” chick. But when she’s leaving the State then it’s no longer necessary for her to pretend that we were close anymore.
Saturday, we’re on the phone and she’s on her way to meet with the girls. I turned to my mother and said, “I bet you I won’t see her before she leaves.” She said she’d call me back.
We haven’t spoken since.
I knew she had a job interview in Atlanta that Thursday and she was scheduled to leave on Tuesday. Tuesday came and went. I text her Thursday to ask if she was in Georgia.
“I sho is!”
I sent her a follow up text to ask how her interview went.
Next Sunday, she sent me a picture text of herself with the header “remember me?”
I don’t remember what I answered, but we haven’t spoken or text each other for months. My friend recently asked me why I haven’t called her. My thought is, “if all I was was the other single chick to go out with, then all we had as a bond was going out. She’s not even in the state anymore, there’s no reason for us to talk now.”
Not only that, but with EVERYTHING that I have going on in my life right now (which I am going to write in a future post) I am not gonna hunt down any bird that doesn’t wanna maintain a friendship with me. I’m straight. Considering that she knows what’s going on in my life and hasn’t even called to check turns the volume that it speaks to level 11 (on a system that only goes to level 10) I’m just writing off the friendship to, “one of them thangs.”
My friend says that I should call her. I say, “negative.” I’m at a time in my life where I wonder “what do you add to my life?” before considering people to let in. Even as I typed this, I left out some of the things that she used to do/say that would drive me to want to stick a fork in my eye. I say I’m alright with letting this one lie. I’m not chasing down anyone. Especially a chick!
But what do you think? Am I letting pride get the best of a situation. Do you think I should call her? After everything, what could there POSSIBLY be to say.*Sigh*
Share your thoughts in the comments. . .
Peace and Love, Nick