I’m not sexy……
“He called me ‘sexy’. Sexy is the thing I try to get them to see me as after I win them over with my personality.. smart? yes. Maybe even cute, but sexy?” -Miranda (Sex and the City)
It’s not a secret that I’m a tomboy. We all know this, so let’s not act surprised. I went to the race track with my father, owned a skateboard, and dug up dirt in the backyard. It’s something that I accept. When I was 18, I sat on the corner with the fellas, drank St. Ides and smoked Black and Milds (mmm) and I’m fine with that. There’s some benefits to being a tomboy. (which I’ll probably discuss in a later post) but the benefits aren’t what I wish to discuss today. There’s one major drawback..
I’m not sexy…
Now, before we start to examine this, let me say this is NOT me fishing. This is a post derived from the post-it on my desk with the above quote on it. I wrote it down because it captured everything I’ve ever felt about the way I am.
In my teens, I didn’t have a problem fetching members of the opposite sex. I think back then it might’ve been considered “adorable” to be dating the girl that carried the Jansport backpack with the Nike shorts. The thing is that I’m almost 32. In this age where Rick Ross videos reign supreme, I’m realizing that not only will I never Be Stacey Dash (and that’s fine) but I figure that I will not be the woman that the guys talk about when they’re taking breaks in between the 3-on-3.
I’m beginning to wonder if I will always be that “cool chick.” I’m the one that they’ll invite over to play ps3 with. We’ll watch football games and spend a Sunday changing the brakes. I’ll assemble a bookcase and go under the sink to drain a pipe. Will I be the wife that dresses in lingerie without looking silly? Probably not. And for DAMN SURE I’m not twirling around a pole. Trust me when I say that my husband will just end up laughing, and I’m such a klutz that something will probably end up broken. My head, My spine, My spirit? All are up for grabs.
Men Say that they want a smart woman, but let’s be real, when a guy walks up to a woman it’s not because she looks like she’s smart. It’s because there’s a certain thing that drew him to her. And I didn’t take a poll or anything, but I can fathom a guess that it wasn’t because it looked like she could give him some competition in Jeopardy. I don’t bat lashes that were fixed with glue. I REALLY don’t have my hair coiffed like I’m coming from the “Magnificent” video shoot. And I’m beginning to wonder if this will somehow be my downfall.
Yeah yeah, I know “someone will love you for you.” and “God has your perfect person.” I love cliche’s (can’t you tell?) but I’m wondering if the product of this environment has men looking for Unicorns among Arabians.*
When I try to be sexy there’s usually some consequences that involve me embarrassed in some way, so I stopped doing it. I’m just realizing that my current locale (S. Florida) doesn’t suit me so well. Men are not known for looking past the surface and trying to see what’s understated. The beauty that’s not blatantly pushed up does not get the guy. We would all like to believe that we’re evolving, but I don’t find it to be the case. I’ll shove a disclaimer in here and say that Miami/Ft. Lauderdale might be a different look in comparison to the rest of the nation. I dare say, not by much.
The brainy comic will keep you laughing. Unfortunately, it’s on the telephone after you called her to talk about why she didn’t call. This isn’t so much a comical post as an introspective one. I’m wondering if I just so happened to be born a few decades too late. I’m sure there’s more I can write, but I’ll just end this….
Is sexy overrated? And yes, I know that confidence is sexy, that’s not the type of sexy that I mean. In a world of acrylic, do you find yourself a brand of cashmere left unappreciated? Men, am I totally off? Is this just a byproduct of too many videos? That “Cheekietopia”* isn’t looking so bad right now..
* Arabians are a breed of horse, known for their beauty
* An island made up by @pinchmycheekie. it’s inhabitants are smart and beautiful.. and real…